Bright young women sick of swimmin', ready to stand

I feel as though if words were going to describe my life sometimes, it would be these. I am not saying I am a brilliant individual but I'm in no way stupid. I am so capable of achieving the world if I so desired yet every attempt is thwarted but my father who asks as though I'm a child. It's as though I can't fully comprehend what the "grown-ups" are talking about when I know fully well the situation. I just want to be given a chance to show myself. I'm just ready to stand, I'm sick of swimming, it's like I'm stuck in the pool and I feel as though I am drowning. Every time I try to get out something pulls me back down further and further. Sometimes I feel as though one of these days I'm going fall into black nothingness. Either that or I'm going to propel myself up with so much force it is going to shake the whole wide world. Sometimes I feel so invincible when I think of my future, of what I could  become, and who I could influence. A read a note today that I was given  where the writer said that if anyone could change the world, it could be me. I would really love to believe that. Imagine it, what kind of legacy could I leave? I have no idea, I just know that I have the greatest desire to be way more that I am right now, I am determined nothing and no one will stand in my way. I am invincible.  

Okay so I have been really bad about posting but I have been crazy busy. It seems like life gets in the way of even the best intentions. Well I stopped liking the journal prompts so I'm just going to express my thoughts a bit. Today was Christmas and I hope that everyone had a wonderful day. I got a few gifts that made me think about my future, mainly my kids. I know lame, but I have realized that I just want my children to love reading. I got a couple of children's bibles and reference book and I can't wait to introduce that to my children. I want to read to them all the time, sit and read them the bible while they nap, read them all the great classics and help them discover new worlds, and just the magic that books contain. Books are my escape and I feel as though I have been betraying them because I haven't hardly read at all :/ I just don't have the time anymore and it kills me. Speaking of books and reading out loud I have realized one tradition that will continue with my family, every Christmas morning before opening presents we are going to read the Christmas story. A lot of families don't do that anymore and yes it is nice to receive presents but I want my children to realize that the only reason we give presents is because God was gracious enough to give us the greatest present of all, himself. I know I know this is starting to sound preachy so I'll sign off but have a Merry Christmas!

Sorry that I haven't written in a few days! I've been really busy but I'm back now! So today's challenge was 
Day 3: Your day in detail
My day wasn't really anything special, I stayed at my mom's house last night and so I woke up to my sister begging for a ride to school, she can't drive yet, which I refused her considering it was 6 in the morning and she woke me up, bad idea. Went back to sleep and got up at like 9:30, visited with my nephew for a bit and then headed home and had a jam session in the car. Cranked some gospel up in there haha. Anyways I ended up forgetting my wallet at my mom's so I couldn't deposit my check *insert extremely sad, broke college kid picture here* but I called my friend and he came and picked me up and took me out to buffalo wild wings which was yummy. He then put windshield wiper fluid in my car like the awesome guy he is. (I don't think you can end sentences with is, oh well it is what it is) But then I had to get ready for work so I went to work and stressed out a bit and then came home, brushed out my hair, which is time consuming when you have as much as I do, and sat down and started to write this post. Well that has been just another exciting day in my life, I think as an end to today I may write a bit more and then sit down and read The Lord of the Rings, I just bought the entire collection in one the other day and since I don't have much time for reading I am going to take advantage of what little I do have. I will write tomorrow. Goodnight (:

Day 2: Something you look forward to in the next 12 months. In the next 12 months there are the basic every year things that I look forward to, camp, midwinter, summer break etc. but only 2 really neat things that I can't wait for . The one that most people look forward to is the becoming an adult thing, I'll be 18 next September! (go me I've lived to be an adult, make it stop!) and while that's exciting because I get to be able to legally do things, like smoke (Ehw) or vote, or uhm be out past curfew I'm not really looking forward to it. Mostly the best part is that I'll be able to get a better job than Wendy's It's not much different from what I'm doing right now. I pretty much do what I like. The thing I'm really looking forward to is in June, its when, if all plays out as I hope it will, I'll be going on my first missions trip to Chile! Being in the missions field is all I really wanna do. If I don't ever do anything with my life other than become a missionary for even a short period of time I will have considered my life a success. I just want to be able to show those who don't know about the Gospel what they are missing out on and if I can travel the world while doing so who am I to stop it? It's all I can think about lately. I'm even trying to pick up as many shifts as I possibly can while on semester break. I know that things are all up in the air right now but it would be a dream come true and I would give anything to be able to go.

Here’s my attempt to become a better writer, I am starting to realize how much I love it so here we go?

Day 1: Basic things about yourself.

Hmm… let’s see, I’m 17 a freshman in college. I am currently a crew member at wendys but that doesn't exactly describe me. I’m fairly pretty i guess, depending on who you ask but since you’re asking my I’ll stick with fairly. I’m not exactly the most exciting teenager out there. my life basically revolves around work, church and school. I love crocheting, is one of the things I try to do to relax, I’m getting pretty good at it as well(: I am very active in church, since I am still kinda youth group and just joined the hyphen group I’m pretty busy trying to keep the peace. not only do I do that but I work in the nursery and teach Sunday school for the little ones, oh and can’t forget I run the computer for a lot of services so I stay busy with that. Uhm I fangirl a lot, I watch shows and read books a lot  because they are a great escape, granted I don’t get as much reading time as I would like. I try to spend time with my family but they get under my skin so it doesn't always become a priority. I currently live with my dad and step mom but I get to see my mom quite a bit now that I can drive. I love my siblings dearly but I don't hardly get to see them. Currently not in a relationship because I’m waiting for the right person, which people tend to have a hard time understanding. It’s not that I can’t love it’s more that I want to love the right one. Oh  and for talents I’m an okay musician I played the violin for 7 years. Well that’s kinda my synopsis I don’t really know what else to say about myself, maybe I will discover me through this journey, who knows? Well A Demain! Oh wait, I forgot I also speak French okay now bye!